Sorry for the length in advance
So alot of you know I used to work in the Wall Street Salt Mines. My first big firm was headquartered in Hackensack, NJ (should have been a tip-off).

They originally had me working the 5th Avenue Office and it was great, then they moved me to the Long Island office which was in Huntington, NY. The commute out was fine, but the commute BACk to the city was a nightmare. Anyway, I was toiling away, making ALOT of money. So I was relatively happy/complacent/whatever.

UNTIL one day I realized that the branch I was working in (and had been promoted to managing a team in) was financed, overseen and secured by the Bonanno Crime Family. (no bull$hit)

For those of you unfamiliar, think: "Boiler Room" meets "Wall Street" meets "Goodfellas". They even had a 'security guy' who looked JUSt like Ray Liotta after about 5 years of steroids! HUGE guy...name was Defalco.

I had been a Marine, where honor and duty were the catch words...and ended up squarley in with the nastiest, vilest creatures on the planet.

So I decided to leave. I was on my way into the office to get my paycheck (we got paid once a month) and then resign and obsessing over what the hell I was going to do. I mean, one broker who left ended up in a mysterious car accident and another ended up getting beaten up at his new firm...literally RIGHT in front of the whole office.

So a commercial came over the radio for $199 flights to London. I booked it before I even parked my car at the office...to leave the next day...from Baltimore, Maryland.

SO I go in, get my check, go to the bank and CASH it, then head back to resign. I waited until all but one of the big bosses were gone and went up to him and resigned.

I rush back to the city, collect my dog and other necessary items to head to Maryland to leave for the UK to let it all blow over a bit before coming back to start with the new firm I had accepted a position with...

I get home to Maryland, drop the dog at the folks and have my Dad drop me off at the airport for my flight. I am waiting in line and my cell phone rings...I pick up the call and I hear Defalco SCREAMING: "I am going to find you, rip your fucking head off and shit down your mother fucking neck!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

I dont think in my entire life that I had ever 'blanched'...turned white with fear...my knees were as weak as a sapling in a hurricane...I could literally feel the blood rushing away from my face. I just KNEW he already knew where I was and where I was going...

Then, I heard the strangest sound: laughter. He was taking the piss! He was calling me because he wanted to make sure wherever I ended up, that we could still be FRIENDS! I have NEVER been so terrified in all my life...and the bastard was just messing with me.

To THIS day, I am STILL friends with that guy...partly because I am afraid if I ever tell him I dont want to be his friend...well, that he might revisit his threat that day on the phone.
( Citadel Because the world needs less morons, Thu 22 May 2008, 17:36, 6 replies)

*click*
Ah, organised crime bosses. They're all big softies underneath. Or something.
( Maladicta, Thu 22 May 2008, 17:56, closed)

I think
I'd have needed rescusitation after he said that!

"Blanched" wouldn't have covered it
(TheWeeWitch hasn't been here much recently .., Thu 22 May 2008, 17:57, closed)

Christ on a bike...
With friends like that, who needs enemies.
( girlinthehole, Thu 22 May 2008, 18:16, closed)

Classic!
I've worked for Mafioso in the past myself, so I can (somewhat) sympathize. Scary fuckers, mainly because they're so unpredictable.
( The Resident Loon Not a demographic. Do not measure., Thu 22 May 2008, 18:39, closed)

Yeah, you NEVER know with those guys
But one thing I have to hand them: they have a hand in EVERYthing! I was driving to work one morning, listening to Stern (Howard) and he mentioned that the Mtv Music Awards were THAT night. One phone call later, and I had 4 backstage passes ($1500 a piece) and 4 seats in the theater ($500 a piece).

Those guys were the ULTIMATE hook-up!
( Citadel Because the world needs less morons, Thu 22 May 2008, 20:43, closed)

AlI I could think of..
reading that was the scene from Goodfellas

"You mean, let me understand this cause, ya know maybe it's me, I'm a little fucked up maybe, but I'm funny how, I mean funny like I'm a clown, I amuse you? I make you laugh, I'm here to fuckin' amuse you? What do you mean funny, funny how? How am I funny?"
(Fluke feels bitter as well as thick, Fri 23 May 2008, 14:17, closed)