Carpet Flouncing
My very first ever job, YTS, was as an assistant to a carpet fitter in a family run, local, and reasonably successful business.

At first it was OK, i like the smell of new carpets, unfortunately back then new carpets and their method of manufacture would likely give you teh cancer. Anyways. One Friday i was meant to be meeting a girl i had met just a few weeks earlier, even phoned her from a customers house to make sure she was still up for it, she was. I had arranged to meet her at 7pm. It was now 6pm and we had just finished a job, with 2 more to go. As we approached the train station, which was on the way to the next job, i told the guy to stop, and simply got out and walked away, much to his scorn about being sacked on the monday, big fucking deal. I countered with something along the lines of...I had some 16 year old pussy to explore and that, my hairy faced friend, is infinitely more important than gripper boards and fucking underlay. Goodbye.

At my current job, i work in a windowless dungeon and, get no breaks, save a dinner time and am managed by creatures more suited to swinging from trees, the fucking chimp cunts. Anyways, when i do leave here, which will be sooner rather than later, i have already dreamt up a few 'presents'

1. A frozen fish stuck above the roof tiles, frozen because by the time it thaws out the day will be over and i will be off to fuck. Frozen prawns shoved into gaps too small to be able to retrieve them.

2. Im going to shit in the cistern so that when flushed there will be a sickening influx of yellow/brown water for the forseeable future.

3. Send the head chimp an anonymous card stating that she is in fact incapable of bipedal locomotion, has a 'hair dont' and should consider cutting her own fucking throat.

Then again, i will probably leave quietly, but with a smile.
(Cancer Joy was short lived, Fri 23 May 2008, 13:02, 3 replies)

The irony is...
....I know a few carpet fitters, and they all have one thing in common. They're all minted.

Hope she was good. Have a click anyway.
( The Pollitt chooses to listen to Enya on, Fri 23 May 2008, 14:19, closed)

yes
i know, the guys i was working with were minted, i suppose, but they all had athiritis in their knees, so fuck them ALL.
(Cancer Joy was short lived, Fri 23 May 2008, 14:53, closed)

Im going to shit in the cistern...
as a plumber i see the joy that will bring!

click x
( blaireau69 , the Cumbrian Travis Bickle., Fri 23 May 2008, 15:13, closed)