I think that maybe it would have been better if this question was based on the steps we take in not wanting to appear racist, rather than actaul racism cast onto apparent family members.
For example, I once had someone come round to the flat to discuss what the management company had planned for the communal garden. I apologised for the fact that there was a load of washing hanging up in the flat and he said 'That's OK, my place looks like a chinese laundry every weekend too.' At least that what I think he meant to say, because half way through, the Korean mrs Quackblast showed her face and he actually said 'That's OK, my place looks like a Chineeeeeeese Laund er mumble mumble mumble weekend'. He looked at me as if I was about to throw him out into the street.

What is it that makes us think a perfectly rational sentence meant with no offence could possibly cause offence?? I have a friend called Nigel who works in Madrid and his colleagues pronounce his name Niggel, with a hard 'G' and every time they say it he thinks, 'bloody hell, I hope no one heard that.'
(FartThroughAWalkieTalkie wished you were dead in ditch on, Mon 31 Oct 2011, 13:34, 10 replies)

Chinese laundry is a term of racial abuse?
Then again, Urban Dictionary thinks it's a sex act, so the world may have moved on without me (again),
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Mon 31 Oct 2011, 13:56, closed)

Is racial stereotyping
Not a form of racism?
( wakeupandsmellthebacon, Mon 31 Oct 2011, 14:02, closed)

Is it stereotyping to describe a laundry, staffed by individuals of chinese heritage, as a Chinese laundry?
Our high street is full of Chinese takeaways (serving Chinese food, and staffed by Chinese emigrants), but no one makes a fuss.
Most of the Indian takeaways are staffed by people of Bangladeshi heritage, but that doesn't cause any upset, either.

Then again, my only experience of a Chinese laundry is from the pages of Dandy comics, so perhaps I've simply grown up unaware of the terrible racial slur - is it similar to how "paki shop" used to be used?
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Mon 31 Oct 2011, 14:09, closed)

Perhaps, though what is racially offensive is up to each person. Should I be offended if someone dresses up as a Viking for Halloween because it "insults my heritage "? I don't feel offended but maybe I should be. I don't know. I am often confused about what is PC and acceptable and what isn't.
(tyrellsOwl, Mon 31 Oct 2011, 14:12, closed)

I think it was more of a point of
'She'll think I've only said 'chinese Laundry' rather than 'laundry' because she's chinese, and her not being racially similar to me has leapt to the front of my train of thought. I hope she doesn't think I'm a racist'.

My point was that this QOTW has allowed people to semi-anonymously rehash old racist jokes, projected onto their supposed grandparents. In reality we tend to do the opposite and think we are being far more offensive than we actually are, thinking we cause cause offence even when none was meant or even realised. I know someone who upon meeting a mutual friend's japanese girlfriend said 'What are winters like in Japan? It's not normally this cold here, but there's a nip in the air today' Two hours later he suddenly said 'Oh Fuck! I said 'nip' to that japanese girl. She's going to think I'm a right twat'(Turns out she did, but not because of that.)
(FartThroughAWalkieTalkie wished you were dead in ditch on, Mon 31 Oct 2011, 15:03, closed)

I'm ashamed to admit that I will, on occasion, describe cold mornings as being "like Pearl Harbour".
For shame.

Anyway, I take your point. Friend of mine was dating a midget, and I would invariably address her as if she were a small child. I didn't mean to, but her loathing of me was quite justified.
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Mon 31 Oct 2011, 15:53, closed)

Difficult one
...because at what point is for example "Paki shop" - personally for me that's over the line; whereas saying "Going for a Chinky" is (I think) acceptable.

I don't think it's so much the words, as they way they are said. On the other hand, as a white person, what would I know ? The only time I've been racially insulted was being called a nigger by a black kid (and yes, it was meant as an insult, not a Tarrantino-style attempt at bonding).
(TheImmortalJenkins, Mon 31 Oct 2011, 15:59, closed)

both terms are a bad as the other
as they cause offense to those races. Whether you think it is acceptable or not does not actually matter. The effect language has on the recipient does.

Would you feel comfortable going upto a Chinese person and saying "oi Chinky"?

Quote - "On the other hand, as a white person, what would I know ?" Being white is not really an excuse either, believe it or not I actually know one or two white people who are reasonably clever, not many but a few. (sorry I could not resist it...)
( sutit only the crumbliest, flakiest posts, Mon 31 Oct 2011, 20:28, closed)

My great aunt used to go to the wool stall on the market and ask for Negro wool
The black dude knew she meant black wool and took no offence.
( thistle, Mon 31 Oct 2011, 20:28, closed)

Was your great aunt Spanish?

( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Mon 31 Oct 2011, 21:47, closed)