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This is a question Random Acts of Evil

Mr Twisty Cheeky asks: As a contrast to last week's question - Has anyone ever been evil to you, out of the blue, for no reason? Have you ever been total twuntcake against all logic?

(, Thu 16 Feb 2012, 18:49)
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Seemed like a good idea at the time and the statue of limitations is up so...
2am in California means you are done drinking. After a jovial night down at the pub with some friends, the lights came on and it was time to go home. There was a cheap pleathor jacket still hanging on the coat rack and we were the last ones there.

"Anyone's jacket? Cheap pleathor jacket? Anyone?" I announced. But by this time everyone had left. After a quick inspection of the pockets I found a massive key ring. With a Porsche key on it.

My friends and I checked the parking lot. No Porsche. However there was a Volvo parked behind the pub. And after a closer look there was a Volvo key on the key chain. Originally we were just going to leave the jacket and keys in the car. When we opened the trunk we found hundreds of Christian rock tapes. I was young and drunk and suddenly inspired by the Christian tapes.

"Follow me in your car. I wanna see the airbag deploy." My friends were also drunk so they thought it a great idea. So I drove the car into the hills a few miles away. Hitting a telephone pole at 35 miles an hour sounds easy, but when you intentionally try to get the car going that fast and square up with the pole there's some reflex that just won't allow you to do it. Unfortunately there's another reflex that won't allow you to chicken out when 3 of your friends are goading you on.

Wham! I hit the pole going about 25. Pow! Airbag in my face. Cough cough! Airbag fumes. I popped out of the car and into my friends car where I was greeted with dropped jaws and wide eyes.

Something terrible happened to my knee that still bothers me to the day. Of all the stupid, dumb, evil things I have done, this one stands out. Yeah it's kinda a Honda Accord post, but unfortunately it's true.
(, Sun 19 Feb 2012, 11:15, 13 replies)
Oh, goody, a drink-driving story!
This should go down well...
(, Sun 19 Feb 2012, 13:38, closed)
If only you'd died, then we wouldn't have to have read that.

(, Sun 19 Feb 2012, 15:07, closed)
He couldn't even manage to maim himself properly.
3/10 at best.
(, Sun 19 Feb 2012, 15:12, closed)
It was a Volvo.
Safety first!
(, Sun 19 Feb 2012, 18:48, closed)
although well done
for actually coming up with an answer that was a) evil and b) seemingly random.

Rare this week. Expect plenty of people to call you bad names, as a consequence.
(, Sun 19 Feb 2012, 16:29, closed)
I reckon it's a cracking post.
Ticks all of the boxes.
(, Sun 19 Feb 2012, 18:48, closed)
"seemingly random"?
Argh.
(, Sun 19 Feb 2012, 18:53, closed)
Click
But yeah, you will get shit for this from the hall monitors. Fuck em.
(, Sun 19 Feb 2012, 18:09, closed)

haha! awesome story! I love it because it will piss loads of people off..
Cracking up at the sheer cuntishness of taking someones car and just writing it off for a laugh!!!
(, Sun 19 Feb 2012, 19:47, closed)

I think it's a justifiable crash test. You could splash out on an overpriced Swedish tank, drive it all your life, and never know if the safety claims are exagerated. Or you could nick one, crash it and find out.
(, Sun 19 Feb 2012, 20:41, closed)

My friend kept the pleathor jacket and wears it once a year as a conversation piece. Being young and drunk at that moment in time I was like, why wouldn't I steal a car and crash it into a pole? Defiantly not the worst thing I've done but probably the most evil.
(, Mon 20 Feb 2012, 0:10, closed)
Pleathor
is easily my favourite character from Lord of the Rings.
(, Mon 20 Feb 2012, 9:52, closed)
My mate
was traced through the DNA he left in his face print on the airbag after he crashed a stolen car. Silly cunt.
(, Mon 20 Feb 2012, 0:26, closed)
It's funny
because there were Christian rock tapes in the boot, so the owner must have thought Jesus was mad at him.
(, Tue 21 Feb 2012, 16:34, closed)

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