Payback
I'm not one for revenge or spite. So, when I'd broken up with the batshit-mentalist who cheated on me, I just got on with my life. In fact, we're still friends.

But one thing did bother me: a really annoying bloke that she'd become friends with shortly before we split up was always glomming on to me, trying to be all matey and inviting himself along to clubs etc with me and my real friends. He was the kind of bloke who makes you want to have a shower after spending any time with him, and very hard to get rid of - the human equivalent of slug slime.

I made a few enquiries, and confirmed a suspicion I'd had for a while. The next time he bounded up to me in a club, and tried to worm his way into my group, I looked him in the eye and said in a loud voice, "Look, Tom, I know you shagged my girlfriend behind my back, so I really don't think we're ever going to be mates, do you?"

The look on his face was almost worth the months of pain and chaos she gave me. He clearly had no idea that I knew. Funnily enough, when I see him these days, he gives no sign of recognising me...

Apologies for the merely tangential relevance, but it makes me smile even today
(moon monkey is busy making memories worth repressing, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 14:56, 2 replies)

Nicely
I don't get why he wanted to be your mate so badly though. Sounds like a bit of a mentalist himself.
(MrOli is ugly, but in the morning you will be sober, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 16:32, closed)

Oh yes
they made quite a pair.

Actually, he had an genuine history of mental illness, so I guess you have to forgive him a certain amount. But that doesn't mean you have to put up with the annoying little shit, though.
(moon monkey is busy making memories worth repressing, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 16:48, closed)