Road RageLast week I had to stop a guy attacking another one in the middle of the road - one had run the lights whilst on the phone and the other had objected. I actually had to take the attacker's car keys out of their car and tell him he wasn't getting them back till he calmed down.
Looking back on it, I was lucky I was feeling all parental and in control or the situation could have panned out very differently.
Have you lost it on the roads, or have you been on the recieving end of some nutter?
(
chthonic, Thu 12 Oct 2006, 21:31)
« Go Back
Canal rageOk, not strictly a road until the last line of the story.
About ten years ago we were on a narrowboat holiday on the Shropshire Union Canal. This goes north-south through the middle of Chester. Now Chester always sounds lovely and picture postcard-y, until you realise that the northern suburbs are basically Toxteth overspill, and that's where the canal goes.
So as a fairly gangly and not particularly well-built 22-year old, I was standing on the back of the boat, steering. Local kids appear on the bank and start throwing rocks of increasing size at me. I can't really do much about this, as there's about 15ft of water between me and them, and I don't have any ammunition to hand.
Instead I just start shouting abuse, which isn't very helpful but feels therapeutic. Eventually (remember we're travelling at 3mph here) some of the rest of the crew hear me shouting and poke their head out to investigate.
Scally kids think, wahey, some more targets to hit. Until I steer the boat towards the bank, at which point:
a) One quite large 22-year old jumps out from the narrowboat side-hatch with one of the detachable metal table legs
b) Another, not large, but very athletic 22-year old jumps off the bows with the other detachable metal table leg
c) A final 22-year old jumps out from the stern with long hair, pallid skin, a long leather jacket, and a lovingly-sharpened billhook.
I've never seen anyone run so fast.
About a minute later I heard a "PAAAAAAAAARP" from the main road which we'd just passed under. What was that?, I asked crew member B as he returned from the chase. Oh, he says, that was the sound of five sh?t-scared scally kids almost being run over by an articulated lorry.
(, Fri 13 Oct 2006, 12:01, Reply)
« Go Back