Norwich, you say?
I made my only visit as an adult this summer. I was actually visiting my sister in one of its satellite villages, and wanted to watch the second Lions Test, it being about the most important rugby game of the year.

My sister lives a stone's throw from *the* pub, so I wandered down about an hour before kick-off, to find it was basically a small room with a 14" TV in the corner and three elderly couples picking at ploughman's lunches.

"Errm, are you showing the rugby?" I ambitiously ask.

Shake of head from crone behind bar.

"Any idea where they might be showing it?"

Shrug of shoulders, followed by the names of what I presume are Norfolk towns. Rush back to my sister's to look at Google Maps, then decide a local rugby club might be the best bet. Set off sans atlas, miss a crucial turn, and find myself on the road to Norwich.

"Never mind", thinks I, "I'm on a major road, so I'll just stop at the first pub with one of those big 'Sky Sports here' banners". None are forthcoming, and the couple I speculatively stop at are also full of old people eating lunch. Next thing I know I'm in Norwich, so again stop at a large pub to try my luck.

"Nope, we bain't got Skoy", trills the barmaid, but scratches her head (literally and figuratively) while she tries to think of a place that might. She gives me a possible option, and I think I've struck gold when I arrive, as I finally see one of those massive white tarpaulins stretched the length of the exterior proclaiming its possession of a Sky box. At this point the game has kicked off and I'm listening on Five Live.

My hopes are dashed though as the pub seems to be the nexus of the local singlet, tattoos and pit bull set, who are intently staring at horse racing on a big screen. They have no interest in the rugby, but are very helpful and draw me a map on the back of a betting slip showing me how to get to the "sports bar" in town. This turns out to be an old cinema, with about six elderly gents watching the Lions game on a big screen, and a barman with one and a half arms.

And after all that we lost the game with the last kick.
(Vice Admiral Sir Charles Cockbrush KCB MBE DSO, who is finding it increasingly difficult to log into b3ta.com wants to duck your aunt and kick your puppy, Fri 30 Oct 2009, 11:17, Reply)