A mate of mine
once had his jaw in wires as his "friend" gave him a lift on his newly aquired motorbike and got thrown off when the driver started speeding away from a parked police car and plowed into the side of a Volvo. Funnily enough friend became ex-friend very quickly after that (and especially once he was healthy again, he beat the fuck out of him for putting him in that situation).

But anyhows, matey was in pain and was up and about, but he couldn't chew anything. His face closely resembled Hannibal Lector with the wire grill over his chin and jaw and he had wires sticking through various parts of his mouth. Every item of food he injested was via a straw and the painkillers were not a great help, so he took to drinking for a while.

I was working in a pub at the time so he was landed with that. He'd come down and sit by the bar for a bit while drinking beer through a straw. As he was a paying customer the landlady didn't mind. In fact she loved it. Mainly because everytime me mate laughed, it moved the wires in his jaw and hurt him like hell.

So she'd deliberately do stuff like make sandwiches and hold them in front of his face while demanding him to eat them otherwise he's barred. He'd make some noise like "Murrrrrghh!!!" and start to grin and slightly bleed too. Tickling him was funnier, and getting him to pull faces etc. In fact everytime she saw him she'd do something random and childish just to make him hurt. He'd end up hiding from her in different corners of the pub trying to avoid her but she'd end up spotting him and going in for the kill again.

Torturous cow, funny as feck to watch though.
( Jeccius Steam Borderlands 2 junkie, Thu 24 Dec 2009, 16:46, Reply)