Owl Stretching Time
Despite being at a Grammar School I was in the bottom set for French, this was basically the dozen worst pupils stuck in a room with the slightly psychotic teacher Mr K. Mr K was old school, called everyone by their surnames, and would regularly threaten students. Only one or two ever got a beating more through luck and the law than any self restraint on his part. The kid whose Dad had sold MR K a dodgy second hand porsche that broke down beyond repair after 4 months was one major target of his Ire.

He also had the sort of moustache that looked out of place anywhere other than the army or gay porn.

Given we were the bottom set basically meant we were the lazy ones or the ones the teachers didnt like and most of us were actually quite good at French at least by G.C.S.E standard.
French was always held in the same room a semi-underground room that also had a storeroom of it.

One day as we came into the class two of my classmates known as Meanly and Reid turned up each wrapped in a red curtain and with a cushion hidden underneath. They had also drawn swirly moustaches on their top lip with marker pens. They then went and hid in the storecupboard.

Not long after Mr K turned up. and in his usual angry way said to another pupil "SOUTHGATE. WHERE ARE MEANLY AND REID"
and southgate obviously in on the joke replied straight faced

"Well I didnt expect the Spanish Inquisition"

At which point the two lads jumped out of the storeroom menacingly holding their cloak and shouted.

"No one expects the spannish inquisition"

To which mr K straight face just said

"Get out" with no hint of emotion

the rest of the class then wet themselves laughing for a full 30 minutes.

If I have time the story of Gordon Browns moneymaking scheme will be revealed.
(lordofallhesurveys How appropriate you fight like a cow, Mon 2 Feb 2009, 11:06, Reply)