Shit StoriesI once ate four Kendal Mint Cakes and did a white shit. My old school friend Roger had to outdo me. He claimed to have done a "blue bubbling turd" after eating six packets of blackcurrant Chewits. We want to hear your stories of poo, from crapping yourself at your sisters wedding to shitting the bed during sex. Go on - be filthy.
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rob, Wed 5 May 2004, 22:24)
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when I was in IndiaI managed to pick up Giardia - a nasty parasite which makes you shit water and lasted about a year, but I digress...
Whilst out there we met up with a sikh friend of my wife's who was there with her family. We went shopping in Simla which was all very nice and we all had a chortle over the garish orange toilet paper that we bought.
Later on, in a swish restaurant where we were being bought a delicious meal, my intestines did a flip flop and demanded emptying as soon as possible. I excused myself and rushed upstairs to the only toilet in the place, where I proceeded to pebble dash, well sandblast actually, the bowl. I wiped myself and then accidently dropped my garish orange loo roll in the toilet, forgetting that the Indian sewerage system can't take paper. The bowl was frankly an unholy mess.
As soon as I got back downstairs, my wife's friend's mother, a small, serious sikh lady, popped upstairs to use the loo before we left, not really expecting to be confronted with the orange toilet paper she had seen me buy, peppered with the slimey brown contents of my guts. She couldn't look me in the eye for the rest of the trip.
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thorpe www.voodootrombonequartet.com, Thu 6 May 2004, 15:23,
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