How to impress your ex....
Unfortunatly my ex and I split up when she wasn't sure whether or not she was pregnant, we had a couple of weeks where we hated each other, but then we realised how much we were great friends, and she found out that we were going to be parents too.
We got together again for a few weeks but both decided we were better as friends than lovers.

The pregnancy carried on, it turned out to be twins, and she had a bad last few weeks where she looked like a beautiful beach ball and couldn't do much.

So I took her two yr old daughter to her playgroup, it was about 40 mins bus ride away, then I had to hang around for about 3 hours to pick her up again and catch the bus back to the ex's.

Breakfast was from a famous fast food cafe, I won't say which one (the clue is raincoat disney duck.)
It tasted a bit strange, but I'd not had one for a while so it might be me.

By the time we got off the bus I walked the 200yds with my buttocks clenched so hard I could have squashed a lemon flat.
"Here she is, I need the loo".
I sat there for over an hour, and was never so glad that her sink was next to the toilet.
I stood up.
I sat down for another hour.

Now I have a very very pregnant ex stood outside the door wanting to empty her bladder, something that should have been done every 5 minutes.

I manage to stand, cover myself, and flush.
Walked through to the bedroom.
Fell onto the bed.

"Are you not well?"

I've been sat on her shitter for about 90 minutes, I look like I've had all the moisture drawn out of my body, I'm not entirely sure that my trousers are actually covering me totally, and my response is somewhat curt.

"Maybe you should go home?" Part annoyance, part a desire to get the loo back for herself.

Getting home would involve a 20 minute bus ride, then a half mile walk. I can barely get back across the landing to her toilet.

After about another 40 mins on the bed I return to the toilet. I'm empty, just a weak watery liquid.

She's in no physical condition to walk with me to the bus, but give her her due, she did ring me when I got home to check I'd got there okay. The conversation was "I'm here, got to go."

I've never ever been so glad that my bedroom was right next to the bathroom.

I can only assume that it was the breakfast that caused it, but I'm not sure.
(paof2 Nude might not be rude, but rude could be nude..., Thu 27 Mar 2008, 19:23, Reply)