ShopliftingWhen I was young and impressionable and on holiday in France, I followed some friends into a sweet shop and we each stole something. I was so mortified by this, I returned them.
My lack of French hampered this somewhat - they had no idea why the small English boy wanted to add some chews to the open box, and saw it as an attempt by a nasty foreigner oik to contaminate their stock. Not my best day.
What have you lifted?
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chthonic, Thu 10 Jan 2008, 11:13)
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The Great Cane RobberyI have a feeling this is going to be a quiet week for me.
However, a few years back, my mate Simon was in B&Q, to buy some bamboo canes. After picking up a bundle, he trotted off to the checkout to pay for them, but there was no one there to take his hard earned money. Figuring that someone would be along momentarily, he stood and waited, with the appropriate coinage grasped firmly in his hand.
And waited.
And waited.
And waited.
After 5 minutes, there was still no sign of a till monkey and he started to get a bit hacked off. When still there was no sign of anyone desperate to make him part with his cash, he thought ‘Sod this, I’ve got a bus to catch’, and strolled out of the warehouse, across the car park and down the street, still clutching the canes.
Two days later he spotted a familiar figure on Crimestoppers, with the words ‘Do you know who this man is? He was caught on camera walking out of B&Q after stealing some bamboo canes’ ringing in his ears.
He’s now teaching English as a foreign language in Thailand, having fled the country like a poor man’s Ronnie Biggs.
*EDIT* I’m being roped into attending a seminar in the big smoke in the next few weeks. Any London-based B3tans fancy a pint?
**Second edit** Given the Ronnie Biggs reference, I now realise that the title of this story should have been 'The Great Cane Robbery'. That'll teach me to think things through first...
***Third edit*** Bugger it, I'll change the fecker anyway...
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Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Thu 10 Jan 2008, 13:35,
3 replies)
Give us a shout when you'll be in London!I'm sure some of us could crawl out of the woodwork for a pint!
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chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Thu 10 Jan 2008, 14:30,
closed)
Hurrah!It was supposed to be 5th Feb, but apparently the date has been changed, I'll find out tomorrow, hopefully.
Better than sitting in a hotel on your todd, that's for sure.
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Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Thu 10 Jan 2008, 14:55,
closed)
GhoshSilly thing to run off for this - the fact that he waited *may* arguably negate dishonesty, which is a necessary ingredient of theft. He could've opted for having the case go to Crown Court and get a trial by his peers, a jury would be unlikely to convict. Of course it's riskier, but better than waiting for the limitation to pass in Thailand!
(, Thu 10 Jan 2008, 17:52, closed)
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