How Gianni Versace taught Ali G to speak Italian.
Gianni Versace was a huge Ali G fan before he passed on and was reputed to have designed many of Ali’s more ostentatious tracksuits.

As Gianni hadn’t more than a half dozen words of English, let alone any slang, and Ali, barely even able to form a sentence in English certainly didn’t have any Italian, they spent many hours gesticulating wildly and shouting at each other in their respective languages in order that they might be understood.

Now, do not make the mistake of thinking, “How could Gianni Versace be an Ali G fan if he didn’t speak English?” This would be foolish.

In the French release videos, Ali G was eagerly and elegantly voiced by the legendary French actor, Gerard Depardieu, star of ‘Cyrano De Bergerac’, a tale of a man with a nose so big, Steve Martin simply had to steal his story and the wonderful romantic comedy ‘Green Card’ with highly-rated Hollywood screen actress and star of popular Brit-flick, “Four Weddings And A Funeral” , Andy Mac Dowell, now sadly reduced to the role of hair product pimp to balding harpies who are most certainly not worth it.

Gianni Versace, doyen of European fashion and frequent visitor to the capital of fashion, Paris, naturally spoke French like a native – with plenty of spit and an attitude to foreigners to rival a crocodile. Thus had he seen and enjoyed the entire Ali G collection as it stood and thus had he offered the Stainesian one this rare opportunity to be dressed by the one, the only, the true, the original, Versace! (Donnatella sucks!).

During a particularly heated session, the two greats were right at one another’s throats – neither sibilant volume nor windmill-like gesticulation was getting through to or from either man.

“Questa il parola?”, roared Gianni.

“What do him not understand?”, bellowed Ali. “Is only one word!”

“Non capire!”, retorted Gianni, eye to eye with the much taller Ali G, both men’s hands clenched at their chests beseechingly.

“Bling?” inquired Gianni

“Bling!” affirmed Ali, “Yes! Bling!”

“Si? Bling?”, added Gianni, scratching his head.

“Si. Bling” affirmed Ali once again.

As I said, it’s only a rumour.

Rafter
baz
(bazmorningstar efil4nat3b, Fri 2 Jan 2009, 14:05, 2 replies)

That's completely awful
and equally fantastic. *clicks*
(icassu, Fri 2 Jan 2009, 14:33, closed)

^ agrees
Clicks HARD.
( rofl harris, Mon 5 Jan 2009, 15:18, closed)