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This is a question Real-life slapstick

Fact: When someone walks into a lamp-post it makes a very satisfying and hugely hilarious "Ding!" noise. However, it is not quite so funny when the post is in the middle of town and you are the victim. Tell us about hilarious prat-falls.

Thanks to Bob Todd for the suggestion

(, Thu 21 Jan 2010, 12:07)
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Cyclist abuse...
When I first passed my driving test, I couldn't afford a proper car, so had to settle for a rather nasty, rather knackered old Ford, which inevitably was suffering from the signs of old age.

Being keen to learn about how cars work, and being keen to avoid expensive and regular mechanic bills, trips to the scrap yard became quite a regular feature of my life.

My car had the engine power of an emphysemic 60 a day smoker, meaning that it would always struggle to go up hills.

So, there we were, my brother and I, travelling up a very steep hill at a snails pace, when I caught sight of one of those stupid lyra clad poncy cyclists that have got nothing to better to do with their time than cause road accidents.

As we started the ascent, the cyclist started getting bigger and bigger. I dropped down from third, to second, to first, no good, he was still gaining on me and I could see that he'd quite clearly got me in my sights.

Unable to do anything but but my right foot to the floor in the vain hope of going above 10mph, I heard my brother start to make the filthiest, stickiest, dirtiest piece of green phlegm I have ever had the misfortune to witness.

I heard him release the snot rocket, and all I could see from the back of my window was a cyclist covered in what looked like a large piece of nose slime tottering sideways towards the kerb.

Bastard didn't even try to overtake me after that!
(, Fri 22 Jan 2010, 16:26, 6 replies)
I've never understood the hatred toward bikers. They're staying in shape, not contributing any pollution, and they (most of them, anyway) tend to stay out of the way of cars because they know if they get hit, they're the ones that are going to get hurt. It irritates me when they ride in the middle of the road and I have to drive way in the other lane to get around them, but if this guy is overtaking you, then you don't even need to do that. Spitting at him is just sick.
(, Fri 22 Jan 2010, 16:37, closed)
there is the occasional one that cycles like a pillock and thus tars the reputation of cyclists in general, but those are only 1 in 10 of all cyclists.
(, Mon 25 Jan 2010, 14:35, closed)

(, Fri 22 Jan 2010, 16:50, closed)
congrats, you and your brother are assholes
``I saw someone i didn't like. so my brother spat on him. hahahahah.'' jackass.
(, Fri 22 Jan 2010, 16:52, closed)
You cunt
You cunt. That is all.
(, Sun 24 Jan 2010, 13:58, closed)

^ This
(, Mon 25 Jan 2010, 10:46, closed)

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