Traffic cones are evil.
My first night at uni and being the naive little thing I was, I decided to celebrate the occasion by drinking prodigious amounts of alcohol (including, if my memory serves me correctly, marmite and marshmallow flavoured shots)and generaly act like an utter twat. As you do. I have a vague recollection of walking home in the early hours and spying the ultimate student item; the solitary traffic cone. I remember it being a lot heavier than expected, its was the kind used on motorways, weighted down enough to prevent cars knocking them over and twattedly drunk students from stealing them. But steal it I did and after a good half an hour of lugging the bastard thing about, I managed to get it home.

I was so jubilant that I had completed such a task that I decided to throw the cone on the sofa so I could do a little celebratory dance. I never did do my dance, the traffic cone bounced off the sofa pointy end first, straight in to my eye and knocked me clean out.

I'm told it was hilarious, but sadly I wouldn't know.
(Jad, Tue 26 Jan 2010, 10:01, Reply)