Your first cigaretteTo be honest, inhaling the fumes from some burning leaves isn't the most natural thing in the world.
Tell us about the first time. Where, when, and who were you trying to show off to?
Or, if you've never tried a cigarette, tell us something interesting on the subject of smoking.
Personally, I've never ever smoked a cigarette. Lung damage from pneumonia put me off.
(
chthonic, Wed 19 Mar 2008, 18:49)
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Join The (Twitching, Craving & Insanely Aggressive) ClubI would like to express this through the medium of dance.
However, as this is not possible, a tribute to DG and his mucal epiphany. Note, may have elements of generic male conditions and outright lie.
"zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz....BEEP..BEEP..BEEP..BEEP..whazitohgodlateagainnnnn..zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz....BEEP..BEEP..BEEP..THUDCLATTER..BEEP..BEE..click...Ahhhhhshitgottagetupmumblemumble"
"fwump" (Duvet fwumps elegantly)
"scritch scritch scritch" (Aliens-haven't-stolen-genitals-check)
"scratch-scratch-scratch" (Ditto buttocks)
"mumblemumblegrrrrBLARTaaaaah" (amble in direction of bathroom pausing only to discharge a burst of fetid corpse gas en route)
"fwoptinkletinkletinkle" (Majestic fwop of third leg being unleashed [may not be true or to scale] and first tinkleage of the day proceeds)
"Kof...Kof...KoffKoffKoffHnneuurghhKofffHgnHgn" (start of volcanolike cough, winky still in hand as our hero attempts to stem the flow so he can assume correct foetal position)
"HgnKoffHneeuuuuurrrgghhhHuuurrghHuuurrrghhKoffKoff" (Now gripping sink and looking in disbelief at purple death-rictus reflection in the mirror)
"Hrrraaaghhrraaagghhhragghhhr........Flob" (Small alien lifeform starts briskly sliding around sink like a green slimy roulette ball)
"Hurfhurfhurfhurfhurf" (Attempts to suck in some oxygen before death)
Repeat.
(Good luck. I'm on the "cutting down by 1 a day" method. Shite, innit?)
(, Tue 25 Mar 2008, 15:24, Reply)
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