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This is a question Sporting Woe

In which we ask a bunch of pasty-faced shut-ins about their exploits on the sports field. How bad was it for you?

Thanks to scarpe for the suggestion.

(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 13:40)
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Killer was your basic adolescent ball game for breaks.
Stand in a circle, one person throws the ball in the air and whoever caught it threw it at their preferred victim.
You could either leg it and run for your life or join the fracas to be the first person with the ball.
Once the ball was in play the game continued until the end of the break. We used a tennis ball, and for a (very) brief period a cricket ball (one day - 3 trips to hospital and one to the dentist - told by the head of year to lose the cricket ball. At least he was a realist and knew we weren't going to stop playing).

I learned early on that the key strategy was ALWAYS know where the ball was, zig-zagging didn't always work, stutter-stepping or just plain coming to a dead stop were the best tactics for ending the day without a dead leg or a serious bruise.

One day we were playing and some unremembered bastard passed, not threw at, passed the ball to the one person you did not want to be on receiving end of his throw.
Arms like a post spinach Popeye and accuracy of a qualified sniper.
I see the ball leave his hand and zip toward me at warp factor ten and accelerating to speeds Mr Hawking tell us are not possible.
It starts as a grey white dot and just gets bigger, no deviation in course.
This baby is going to spang me right between the eyes.
I was stood still.
In a split second of clarity I realise I have zero seconds to take evasive action and did not even have the time to step to one side to evade even a glancing hit.
I let my knees go, I drop the necessary three to four inches for the ball to pass over my head with an audible whoosh.
A narrow escape.
Unfortunately the boy stood behind me, looking in the same direction did not have the luxury of time to evade said tennis ball.

Our first ever knockout with a tennis ball.
Sorry Alan, but that would have HURT.
Oh, yes it did, didn't it.
Our reaction, we left him there until some girls got a teacher.
The staffs reaction, a lot of laughter and we were told not to aim for the head.

Length, 40 to 60 feet, but incredibly quickly. Sound effects were amazing.
(, Tue 24 Apr 2012, 0:30, 1 reply)
We had a rule to prevent you standing still.
And if you got hit a certain number of times you got to run the 'wall' whereby all participants would line up facing a wall leaving a narrow corridor through which the unlucky lad would have to run whilst we all kicked him. Seemed perfectly natural back then, seems like an ASBO now.
(, Tue 24 Apr 2012, 8:24, closed)

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