Back in year 10
I took history GCSE and in this particular subject we were allocated seats rather than being able to choose where to sit ourselves. As luck would have it I was given a seat right at the back next to two of the more attractive (and thus, I later found out sexually active) female members of the class.

What happened was that Amy, one of the girls, came in on the Monday morning and she had some rather suspect looking scabs above her top lip and down one side of her mouth. Now, our teacher, being wise, old, from Yorkshire and of a particularly sarcastic disposition spotted this and thought he would have a laugh at her expense. He waited for her to start talking whilst he was, as often happened and then stopped, turned to her and enquired as to the nature of her unfortunate condition. "Impetigo" she replied.
"Of course it is" followed by a knowing wink was his response.

Amy scowled at him, those of us who got it sniggered and the lesson then proceeded as normal. Just after that I heard Amy mutter under her breath to her friend Kate "Honestly, I'm going to bite the fucking thing off next time". I didn't know whether to laugh or wince and cross my legs.
( Nimble Colin camera-wrangling, globe-trotting whisky enthusiast, Thu 10 Jun 2004, 13:09, Reply)