Had a row with the missus yesterday.
I am currently on a diet. I weigh myself after my morning ablutions just before I get dressed. Just as I had finished I offered to let her have a go on the scales.

Now, before we go on you have to understand that the bathroom scales have been modified a little. It used to eat batteries very quickly and so I gave up buying PP3's for it and fitted a battery box with a bunch of AAs on a lead instead. This battery box had an on/off switch too so that the scales couldn't even draw any standby juice either. Then the little button switch on one of the feet of the scales fell off and so that pair of contacts are now connected to another switch. Plus you have to remember that I weigh in stones and pounds but she is weighed in Kilos and there is another switch on the bottom for flipping between the two. To operate the scales:
1) Get them out from under the chair without dragging them across the carpet cos that will make the little feet fall off.
2) Switch on at the battery box.
3) Flip the substitute floor contact switch on and off to initiate the calibration sequence (the scales need to do this every time you put new batteries in which, because of point 2, is every time you use it).
4) Once calibrated, flip the foot switch back to on again - the scales will now think someone is standing on them.
5) Get on the scales and read off your weight.
6) Stand on one leg in the vain hope you didn't really weigh that much.
7) Sigh.
8) Get off and switch back both switches.
So you can see, my offer of the scales involved no mean sacrifice on my part because, of course, she is totally incapable of following the perfectly reasonable and logical sequence of necessary steps outlined above.

BUT she jumped down my throat, "WHAT!! with all my clothes on??? (she was already dressed) You just want me to weigh a lot so you can say that I haven't lost any don't you?"

Not really.
(karnuvap, Sun 23 Aug 2009, 20:21, Reply)