The glass tree
My exploits are usually stupid rather than funny, though as I've just turned 18 they should be fresher in my memory than they are.

One stands out. In the house party where I first went with my new friends after going to a new sixth form I apparently got off with 3 girls (vaugely remembered one. Maybe.) and was having a stroll in the garden with one when I decided we should do some gardening, so we dug a hole with our hands and threw a glass in, in the logic that "if we come back in half an hour there'll be a glass tree". There wasn't. Apparently the lawnmower found it and wasn't happy.

That was only my part in it though. Some of the guys there went to the parent's room (only for a minute and, while it's usually out of bounds, his mum really was a milf) randomly opened a drawer and found a vibrator, any number of condoms and lube. Now, as we were still all 16 at the time, this was gold. They proceeded to throw them all around, hit people with the vibrator and generally tell everyone the story of how they found it. These guys turned out to be some of the mates I'd spend most time with in sixth form, and the first time I met them was when they were hitting me in the face with the vibrator to wake me up. I got off lightly - they'd been putting it in other people's mouths while they slept. Realised sixth form was gonna be fun.

Also involving a lot of the same people (the dildo finder's house for his 18th) there was a girl passed out on the bench in his garden. As it was winter we decided we had to take her in, but all attempts to lift her failed because she'd become a dead weight and wouldn't let go of the bench. I said as a joke "well, we can't then, unless we want to take the bench in.", but people started to ask "why don't we bring the bench in?" so we did, and left it in the kitchen. I left soon after because I was on anti biotics and shouldn't have been drinking, but I was told the rest of the night was spent with a couple of people dragging her halfway up the stairs, until she fell down the rest of them about ten times.

I'll miss those parties :)
( Whillow, Thu 13 Apr 2006, 12:34, Reply)