Cockermouth Secondary School Disco Bus
A long time ago in a Cockermouth far, far away there was a party thrown by the teachers for their favorite pupil. His name was Tom Mcvey and and he had just completed a marathon in aid of blind camels. He had run over 30 metres whilst continuously playing the Eastenders theme on his beloved flute.

We were all gathered in the sports hall waiting for our guest of honour, when one of the teachers decided it would be a good idea to pass round a bottle of budweiser. Bad move! All 200 of us there had a sip and we were all instantly paraletic.

kids were being sick on each others shoes and loafers, there was a girl in the corner 'getting off' with a basketball and even Mr French was getting in on the act, wandering around shouting "who wants to see my bell-end?"

"i'm so wrecked" came the cry from one of the students as he woke up to find someone had drawn a detailed reproduction of the architects plans for the building of the new Wembley stadium on his face.

When Tom finally arrived he was appalled. "These young people are inebriated" he scornfully remarked and simply turned and walked back out, playing the theme from Dad's Army on his beloved flute as he went.

Slowly the party died down as the effects of that bottle of Budweiser wore off. We all awoke the next morning lying in what was effectively a swimming pool of vomit. The girl in the corner had 'gone all the way' with the basketball. Apparently they're still together.

Mr French had climbed to the top of the climbing wall and sellotaped his 'bell-end' to the roof and had fallen asleep in this position and the boy with the plans for wembley stadium on his face grew up to be Pol Pot!

We were so wrecked.
(Andrew Avetoom, Thu 20 Apr 2006, 8:06, Reply)