Most internet-friendly scared I've ever been...
Age: 9
Location: VERY steep hill at the edge of town. Road leads into seawall promenade at the bottom.
Purpose: cycle down hill faster than 10 year old brother.
Variable: 6 women with pushchairs, who hadn't realized that the bit going up the hill with the road markings was actually, y'know, a road. Despite all the cars. And lots of signs saying "THIS IS A ROAD".
Events: Having beaten my brother to the base of the hill I had to skid to a stop to avoid the aforementioned silly biddies with biddy buggies. Now sideways-on to the hill, my ability to cycle off was hampered by the 6 women, who all started screaming at me for nearly hitting their babies. I was just about to point out that they were walking across the ENTIRE road in their line of buggies when I heard my brother screaming.

I looked up at the hill.

The biddies looked up at the hill.

My brother streamed DOWN the hill, clutching the handlebars of his bike in sheer terror. "I can't reach the braaaaaakes!" he screamed in a not-very-manly ten year old way.

Staring up at him, I knew that I was going to die. Heading towards me, faster than an atom in a hadron collider, was a ginger idiot who couldn't find the brakes on the bike. Obviously smart enough to want to miss the huge wall of babies and biddies, he instead opted for the safer option.... and steered straight into me.

For a brief moment, I knew what it felt like to fly. Then, for a longer moment, I knew what it felt like to powerslide on my nose for 3 meters of gutter. Retrospectively, flying was more fun.

Bike frame bent almost in half, his wheel buckled, I emerged from sniffing gravel through a broken nose to find out that the biddies, in the spirit of true kindness and concern, were helpfully... screaming at my brother for nearly hitting their babies.

It never occurred to any of them to move.

At the time it scared me that I was going to be hit by my brother at several million miles per hour... in hindsight, it scares me more that a group of (apparently) responsible adults would walk down the middle of a road with buggies, and then react to an accident by complaining rather than phoning an ambulance. Is this now a normal human reaction?
(Sivvus trolley collision in the fruit aisle led to a jam, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 18:20, 2 replies)

Sadly, I think it is.
I was in a multi-car collision recently and I had to call for my own ambulance as the other drivers were detained by the hitter, trying to convince them to not make a police report.

btw, you write quite well for a 9yo.
( kila is reading clocks upside-down as usual, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 19:18, closed)

Heh, yeah I can see how the post is misleading... I'm 22. :P
And bloody hell, that's terrible!
(Sivvus trolley collision in the fruit aisle led to a jam, Thu 5 Apr 2012, 20:38, closed)