Probably the shittest thing i've ever been scared of.
I have a feeling this may be a pearost, but I once had a mild 'episode' after smoking strong skunk alone above an empty pub.

As a young, naive and gangly assistant-manager of said pub, one of my perks was a flat above my workplace. This came with a few other such as free beer, tips, free food and a mild fling with a barmaid amongst other such Honda accord bravado. But the downside was, the pub was a bit spooky and some of the locals were a bit 'odd' (think boisterous farmers, cokeheads, pretend gangsters and such) and quite often I would get up at night to double check all the alarms and doors and such as a matter of principle.

Anyhoo, I quite often traded the odd pint for a wee 'smoke' from some of the locals and most of the time, it was weak enough to just give me the giggles and not much else.
Until I got handed a packed to buggery and super strong 'skunk' spliff (and back then I'd never heard of such devilry).

So picture the scene, I'm getting heavily mashed alone, upstairs (listening to Moby for some reason) and start to get quite anxious from the overwhelming effects of the smoke (and possibly listening to Moby). I hear a noise from a nearby room and I jump in fright. I pause the music, but then think 'Oh fuck now the burglars know i've heard them because i've turned the music off' ,and for a few moments everything is deathly quiet besides my thumping heart and my own sickly panic.

Trying not to make a sound, I go and place my ear against my bedroom door (as you do) and I hear nothing. Just as i'm about to open my door, I hear a FUCKING RUSTLING sound right outside. I jump back and freeze, panicking - I'm trapped.

Adrenaline kicks in, I grab the nearest heavy object and sit on my bed waiting for whatever was outside to finally discover I was the sole inhabitant of the pub, the only thing I can hear is my heart again. After a few moments - nothing stirs. No footsteps. Finally after enough of this horror I finally brave it and venture out ready to ambush my would-be-assailants, I spring open the door, gazing into the darkness of the hall and see nothing.Just a dark hallway, barely lit from the lamp in my room behind me.

But then something in front of me starts FLUTTERING, rising from the darkness, a blackened claw, a wing(?), a beak(?). I could have at that point died. My mind created an image of something terrible, a giant evil bird reaching out to kill me. Fluttering and rustling and... and....

Oh it was a fucking bin bag rustling in a slight breeze.
(mr-lizard Hell's teeth man!, Tue 10 Apr 2012, 7:12, Reply)