Well, that taught 'em
Sammi Evil Nice writes "I shared with two students, and it was always the same; whenever it was near to paytime, my milk *and only this* would disappear.
One of them, John, was a lovely bloke but allergic to nuts. John makes tea. Soon after, John starts swelling up.
ME: Runs, administers epi-pen. "You're going into anaphalactic shock."
HIM: "How do you know?"
ME: "I put almond oil in my milk."
What have you done to teach somebody a lesson?
( , Thu 26 Apr 2007, 14:54)
Sammi Evil Nice writes "I shared with two students, and it was always the same; whenever it was near to paytime, my milk *and only this* would disappear.
One of them, John, was a lovely bloke but allergic to nuts. John makes tea. Soon after, John starts swelling up.
ME: Runs, administers epi-pen. "You're going into anaphalactic shock."
HIM: "How do you know?"
ME: "I put almond oil in my milk."
What have you done to teach somebody a lesson?
( , Thu 26 Apr 2007, 14:54)
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Karma Fairy !
This is a horrible tale, but I think he got his just desserts. Karma Fairy tales !
When I left the godforsaken country of the Isle of Wight in 1982, I moved to Portsmouth on my own and rented a bedsit. I had no friends or family to visit or support me, but I did have a job. I met this man who was a car salesman at the local Ford dealership. Suddenly I was in a new world where I was fraternising with what I thought was the Portsmouth and Southsea Mafia and life was great if you sucked up to said BF. So I got involved. Stupid mistake, and fell in love. Then the tables turned. It was just before Christmas. He started being verbally abusive. I was confused. I didn’t have any money then and credit cards were a big no-no, but I’d saved up some money to buy a coat for the winter. When I wore this coat to go out to one of his car-matey functions he was absolutely convinced I’d got another BF who had bought me the coat. I hadn’t got another BF. Before we went out, in front of me, he’d shredded the coat I’d saved up for and shouted and told me he’d kill me if I ever went near another man. Then he showed me a diamond ring. We were late for the do we were going to so I stupidly dried my tears and went out to said function. He said to me that the ring was a surprise and that I’d made him show it to me before Christmas Day. I was sorry, of course wasn’t I ?
Are you fuming yet ?
So come Christmas Day. He came round, and he was drunk. He said the surprise was that the ring wasn’t for me. He laughed, and left.
So, I phoned the police, gave them the make and model of his Ford Escort he loved so much, and his address where he lived with Mummy and Daddy.
Didn’t see him for 2 years. Don’t know what happened to this day. Saw him after that in a hotel near Cosham when I was a bit more well-off and had joined the fitness club. He tried to say hello. Didn’t even cross the line, because most people can lip-read “Fuck Off”. Then I saw him more recently running a garage in Southsea. There was a website. I was very tempted to get my mate Andy to fuck up the site with spam and porn, but as he didn’t own it (I found out later) I didn’t do it. The garage went bust a year ago.
I do wonder what he is doing now. I learned a lot in those 9 months.
Never upset me, because I will find you one day.
( , Mon 30 Apr 2007, 12:12, Reply)
This is a horrible tale, but I think he got his just desserts. Karma Fairy tales !
When I left the godforsaken country of the Isle of Wight in 1982, I moved to Portsmouth on my own and rented a bedsit. I had no friends or family to visit or support me, but I did have a job. I met this man who was a car salesman at the local Ford dealership. Suddenly I was in a new world where I was fraternising with what I thought was the Portsmouth and Southsea Mafia and life was great if you sucked up to said BF. So I got involved. Stupid mistake, and fell in love. Then the tables turned. It was just before Christmas. He started being verbally abusive. I was confused. I didn’t have any money then and credit cards were a big no-no, but I’d saved up some money to buy a coat for the winter. When I wore this coat to go out to one of his car-matey functions he was absolutely convinced I’d got another BF who had bought me the coat. I hadn’t got another BF. Before we went out, in front of me, he’d shredded the coat I’d saved up for and shouted and told me he’d kill me if I ever went near another man. Then he showed me a diamond ring. We were late for the do we were going to so I stupidly dried my tears and went out to said function. He said to me that the ring was a surprise and that I’d made him show it to me before Christmas Day. I was sorry, of course wasn’t I ?
Are you fuming yet ?
So come Christmas Day. He came round, and he was drunk. He said the surprise was that the ring wasn’t for me. He laughed, and left.
So, I phoned the police, gave them the make and model of his Ford Escort he loved so much, and his address where he lived with Mummy and Daddy.
Didn’t see him for 2 years. Don’t know what happened to this day. Saw him after that in a hotel near Cosham when I was a bit more well-off and had joined the fitness club. He tried to say hello. Didn’t even cross the line, because most people can lip-read “Fuck Off”. Then I saw him more recently running a garage in Southsea. There was a website. I was very tempted to get my mate Andy to fuck up the site with spam and porn, but as he didn’t own it (I found out later) I didn’t do it. The garage went bust a year ago.
I do wonder what he is doing now. I learned a lot in those 9 months.
Never upset me, because I will find you one day.
( , Mon 30 Apr 2007, 12:12, Reply)
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