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This is a question Well, that taught 'em

Sammi Evil Nice writes "I shared with two students, and it was always the same; whenever it was near to paytime, my milk *and only this* would disappear.

One of them, John, was a lovely bloke but allergic to nuts. John makes tea. Soon after, John starts swelling up.

ME: Runs, administers epi-pen. "You're going into anaphalactic shock."
HIM: "How do you know?"
ME: "I put almond oil in my milk."

What have you done to teach somebody a lesson?

(, Thu 26 Apr 2007, 14:54)
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I may as well get this one under the line before it closes.
A few years ago I was the Assistant Manager of a moderatley large superstore, crap hole that it was, but that's besides the point.

One day, during the school holidays, we had some kids hanging around outside, not total yobs, just the little twats that had more money than sense and Mumsy and Dadsy pander to their every need. One of these little twunts decides to come into the store, every few minutes, on his rollerskates, scaring old ladies, knocking over displays, and swearing and such, and, more importantly, pissing off me.

And then he goaded me by saying something to the effect of "Ha Ha! You never catch me!".


The store had automatic sliding doors as they are wont to do, and you can pop a key in and set them in various ways to open and close. I set them to open from the outside, but remain closed if someone tried to exit. The said twunt came careering in, cocky as fuck, and i started walking towards him which made him bolt for the door.

But it didn't open.

Result, one bloody nosed little twat, possibly concussed, who never came in the store again.
(, Thu 3 May 2007, 0:44, Reply)

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