The boss was a cunt...
Whilst working for a fairly small self storage company I had a wonderful time with the seniors in my office.

Actually I'm lying.

There was a mixed bunch of us, There was a heavy metal bass player/singer (the one I got on with the best!), a pornography addicted fat bastard (larger than me!) and the biggest clean freak I've ever had the misfortune to meet.

When I joined I was told there would be office banter, fair enough I thought, what's the worst that can happen! Well it turns out that office banter actually turned into "Ridicule Dr.Spack". After being polite and helpful to customers I was always given the same response from my colleagues which was them saying how horrible I'd just been to the customer and that I'd just called them a dog shit eating cunt. Funny for the first few times but after a year I felt like punching someone.

Then there was the utter bollocks I would get from the clean freak AKA the big boss man himself. Everything would have to be 100% dust free and shining otherwise I'd get bollocked. My time spent at the job was that of a glorified cleaner which was bollocks seems as I signed up to be a salesman. So night after night I would be cleaning out storage rooms (which never satisfied the boss) and making sure everything had been faced up ready for the next days business. As hard as I tried all I got was grief because during the night a microscopic organism had ended up on a shelf or some other twattish excuse.

So the year (which was how long I was working there before getting fired, thanks boss!) dragged on and eventually the accident happened (big van with me driving, small ferrari parked next to the vans parking space and wet feet. Make your own conclusion!) £4800 on the insurance later and my time there was limited.

After coming back from holiday I was instantly fired, the cunt (who gleamed as if he bathed in Cillit Bang) could've told me that BEFORE I got to the fucking office.

There are many things I wish I could've said at the time, but being 17 and not one for confrontations I said fine, shook hands with the metal dude and went home.

After a few other shitty jobs there have only been a few managers who have made jobs fun. Working at a paintball site I had a manager who pretty much gave you everything free which was awesome... until he got fired and then we had the freak who felt everything had to have a sign on it took over. My current job has a couple of the best managers though, I get no grief, plenty of help when I need it (financial and other) and the company is amazing. So I piss on the faces of the previous managers who made life shit and carry on marching forwards knowing that my job has a much higher satisfaction rate than theirs.

99.9% of managers are cunts, there are a few exceptions that make boring jobs good fun. Get on with those managers and always know that it could be much much worse out there.

Length, 2 meters between me and the Ferrari before impact.
(Dr.Spack Dr. Lepper! What's the worst that can happen?, Thu 18 Jun 2009, 13:39, 1 reply)

Aside from a few minor details...
You could actually be telling Jason Newsted's story.
(Chaos_Theory makes epic electro, Thu 18 Jun 2009, 15:57, closed)