Sick burns really do seem to lack a little something when delivered by Willow Ufgood.
( Happy Phantom has been to Hastings, Brighton, and Eastbourne too, Fri 8 Feb 2013, 15:18, 1 reply)

Well Dave, in an exciting twist we appear to have had a spectator run onto the field!
As we understand it, he broke through the safety barriers by pinning a steward to a wall in what appears to be a Honda Accord, and is now using the foam that fell from emvee's mouth during his dismount as some kind of lubricant for a- Yes, I can confirm that he is now having a pokey bum wank on the field, in front of literally tens of spectators. Never in my twenty minutes as an Internetball commentator have I seen anything that has brought so much shame to the sport. Truly this is a dark day for Internetball.
( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Fri 8 Feb 2013, 15:39, closed)

Unfortunately, possessing a Jimmy Hill chin doesn't actually make you a commentator.
( Happy Phantom has been to Hastings, Brighton, and Eastbourne too, Fri 8 Feb 2013, 15:53, closed)

Oh dear Andy, he doesn't appear to be adding much to this match does he? He's just flailing about a bit aimlessly in the hope that it'll help his team.

( Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Fri 8 Feb 2013, 16:22, closed)

The referees have long since abandoned the match here, there'll be no sendings off today.
Some would say that the game has been doomed since former wunderkind and "King of the Game" Legless trolled himself into an early retirement, costing this team their star player and captain. Without him, tactics have all but vanished.
( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Fri 8 Feb 2013, 16:34, closed)

If you're not VERY careful, I'll write a snarky little note about you in my profile.
( Happy Phantom has been to Hastings, Brighton, and Eastbourne too, Fri 8 Feb 2013, 17:32, closed)