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This is a question Kids say the shittiest things

Smudge the Demon asks: Have your kids - or anyone else's - come out with something that provoked extreme laughter, embarrassment, fear or outrage? Tell us your little darlings' memorable sayings. It's like Take a Break's letters page, only with more swearing

(, Thu 23 May 2013, 15:28)
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Outwitted by a five year old

My Ex's Uncle lives in Blackpool and, one Spring day, we went to stay with his family and check out the Pleasure Beach, the Tower and buy 'Kiss Me Quick' hats. His daughter, Ellie, is five and at that age where conversation is a never ending stream of questions. She walked into the front room just as we were putting our jackets on to go out for the day. And thus the interrogation began.

Ellie: "Where are you going?"
Me: "We're going to the Pleasure Beach, Ellie."
E: "Why?"
M: "To go on all the rides."
E: "Why?"
M: "Because they'll be exciting. We don't have rollercoasters in our town."
E: "Why?"
M: "Umm.... there isn't anywhere to put them I suppose."
E: Why?
M: "Ummm... they built shops and offices instead."
E: "Why?"
M: "Errr... so people could have somewhere to go to by stuff and earn the money to do so."
E: "Why?"

At this point her Uncle walked in and she lost interest. Which was frankly a relief as I'd mentally started writing the letter I planned on sending to the council when we got home. "Dear sir, why *did* you build shops and offices instead of rollercoasters...?".

Anyway, me and the ex went out and had a great day. On returning, Ellie was out in the garden making sandcastles in her sand pit. I decided to take revenge for my earlier grilling and give her a taste of her own medicine.

Me: "What ya up to Ellie?"
Ellie: "Making sandcastles"
M: "Why?"
E: "Because I like them. What are you, stupid?"

Outwitted by a five year old.
(, Thu 23 May 2013, 23:44, 1 reply)
You are stupid.
(, Fri 24 May 2013, 9:16, closed)

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