Built Ford Tough
All throughout my childhood, my dad’s sole transportation was a baby-diarrhea-brown mid-70s Ford pickup truck.

One day, while driving down the road in, say, 1993, the rusted bottom fell out of the cab and tumbled into a corn field behind us. He kept driving.

He’d warn all passengers, “Keep your feet up and don’t drop anything!” Rocks would bounce through the hole and dangerously ricochet around the cab, haphazardly glancing off passengers and drivers alike in a sort-of road warrior pinball game. I was later informed that on particularly long journeys, he used the damage to his advantage by pissing out of the gaping fracture while driving.

The truck was finally retired in the late 90s after it decided to self-immolate in a spectacular roadside disaster. I’m sure that if it had not melted to goo, he would have driven it away.

And all this – putting himself and others in harm’s way - for what? So he could save a buck or two. He plans to keep his new car until it sets itself on fire, too. Look out for the headlines in c. 2020.
(TheSnark oh, c'mon, like you didn't see me coming, Fri 24 Oct 2008, 11:03, 3 replies)

But you've underestimated...
... how amazing it is to drive shit cars.

I have owned 9 cars in just 5 years of driving, not one of which I paid more than £100 for. Alright, not all cars had all their paperwork but still ...

And you can NEVER underestimate the fun of patching together a split fuel pipe while fuel is fountaining out from under the back seat with just, I kid you not, a piece of wet chewing gum and some sellotape.

Not to mention the time when my Astra was stolen and I had to go and recover it from Hammersmith. I had to hotwire the bloody thing in front of the police because my ignition had been ripped to shreds and (perhaps on-topic) I was too tight to call out a tow-truck.

The van was the most spectacular. I bought it for £1 from the pikeys (Irish wannabe gypsies) and it was an old Leyland DAF heap. It belched blue smoke, wouldn't start unless you did something complicated with the diesel intake valve and lasted well over two weeks before dying. The back doors looked like someone had literally kicked their way out. Which they probably had, considering the history. Bound and gagged, too.

Then there was both the Metros, both the Fiestas, the Escort/Astra van cut n' shut (that I weighed in after being caught in it by the OB), the Peugeot (WORST car I've ever driven INCLUDING the van), ad nauseum ...

The point is that shit cars are fun! I would have loved to drive your Dad's car. One of my Fiesta's and I'm proud of this, had a different registration number etched onto every single window.

Am a Dad now of course and wifey is nagging me to get a safe family saloon ... :-(

Not yet.
(hangableautobulb is an anagram of the best album ever, on, Fri 24 Oct 2008, 11:56, closed)

Yup, bangers rock.
Years ago I had an ancient camper van, converted from a tipper truck, and took my large brood on holiday to Wales. The idea was that my mate and her kid would come too in their Sierra and we'd share a caravan.

Sadly, she hadn't reckoned on a. how much her kid would love travelling in the camper van with my kds or b. how embarrassing she'd find the van to be around.

No matter that we could cook our tea, change into cossies in privacy, put the younger ones down for a nap in comfort - she hated it.

She finally had enough one day when she'd gone on ahead, then reluctantly turned back to look for us.

All she could see was the van in a lay-by, with my legs sticking out from underneath as I patched the exhaust with a Pepsi can.

That was the last straw -she invented a sudden bereavement and pissed off home.

That repair lasted for months. Good work, if I say so myself.
(Juan Quar is clinging to her front teeth on, Fri 24 Oct 2008, 12:30, closed)

I too Love Teh Shit Car
Its great being able to bodge it to keep it going.

Had a battered Audi 80 on a H plate. paid 280 squids for it. Had it 2 years, added 110k to it and flogged it for 70 squids when the gearbox went .

One day I decided to investigate a slight oil leak. I found a dent with a small hole in the sump pan.

Araldite and a chopped up tin of catfood fixed it good and proper.

Repair was probably stronger than the rest of it.

Good Times
(never-right -getting it wrong since '78, Fri 24 Oct 2008, 15:00, closed)