So tight, they re-used toilet paper after drying it and giving it a scrape.
I used to work behind a bar, many moons ago.. and through a very reputable source who was unfortunately related through marriage to the offender, I heard the above about a regular.. who to look at him, you would think he was homeless. Ragged old clothes, and a look of misery on his face..I couldn't help but think what happened in this mans life to bring him in such a state.

I was told that he was in fact a Millionaire. Laughing I told my informant to Fuck off, and to stop drinking meths.

He was dead serious.

Confused, I looked at him again.. "Are we talking about the same tramp of a man here"?
Apparently we were. He was so tight, he would rarely be seen spending money, and had even been seen begging in the street for cash.

But the best of it was..

"Go past his house, and you won't believe your eyes". Puzzled and more than a little curious, I got his address and drove by for a peek. I found the place..and it was a tiny house with the paint peeling off, but what drew my attention was a bath sitting on the front lawn right next to the path that lead right into town. It had a sign next to it.

I got out of the car and took a closer look at what was written, it read:

"Ye Old Wishing Well. Drop in 50p and make a wish"

I couldn't believe the cheek of the dirty old bugger ! The bath was full of water, and sure enough at the bottom of the bath was a 50p.

Apparently that 50p was glued to the bottom of the bath, and each morning (especially at weekends) he would empty the bath of coins thrown in by school kids, or drunks as they walked home from town.
(TheRiddler Hmmmmm... I concur., Fri 24 Oct 2008, 16:16, Reply)