Think I've posted this before
but a few years back I was on a break in the US and was swimming in one of the Great Lakes when I felt a fairly urgent need to evacuate my bowels. I decided I had three options:

1 - Walk back to the beach pavilion at the parking lot. It was about a 10 minute walk away though, and I didn't relish either the hurried journey or the possibility of being caught short in front of other beachgoers.

2 - Make like a cat, and go up into the dunes, dig a hole, do my business and bury it.

3 - Drop my shorts and do it where I was, in the lake.

Needless to say, I decided on option 3, seeing as I was a reasonable distance from anyone else on the beach and it may have been more obvious if I'd gone up in the dunes.

So I did the business in neck deep water (being careful to orientate myself such that I was facing into the longshore current). One of the most interesting features of this event was the way in which the emitted turd stayed in one piece due to the buoyancy of the water. It was a fair old length too! I was also amused by the way it gracefully tumbled to the lake bed.

Length? About 10 inches I think.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Fri 2 Sep 2005, 12:40, Reply)