Food poisoning
Back a few years when I were but a nipper I went on one of those activity weeks with my school. On the last day we all enjoyed a merry barbeque, and then crowded into the same dormitory for a weird mass sleepover type thing. Fell asleep perfectly happily.

2am and I have a rumbling... I'm about to be sick. Dashing to the loo I trip over Ben, but make it in time for the puking. Ten minutes or so later I think it's all over, and retire to bed.

It wasn't over.

Dashing back to the loo again mere moments after returning, I trip over Ben once more but make it to the loo where I chundered whole spaghetti hoops. It wasn't until the following day I realised that I hadn't eaten spaghetti hoops in quite some weeks. Most weird. Once more, I decide that I've done enough and retire again, only for the same twinge and Ben-tripping as before.

This time I don't make it to the loo but instead decorate the cubicle. I decide to spend my night in the same place admiring my handiwork.

Ben never did like me much after that. He thought I was waking him up on purpose by kicking him and running away like a wuss.
(Captain Skippy pooed in a bag and left it on your doorstep, Sun 4 Sep 2005, 8:49, Reply)