Tch Parents
So there I was merrily minding my own business when my dear ol' ma comes in teary eyed. Being the caring sort of chap I am (and I am indeed a caring sort of chap) I asked her what was wrong. Turns out it was the back-end of some argument she had had with my step-dad. Anyway it moves on from there and Mum is going through all the things that she is struggling with and them comes out with an absolute corker of:

"we haven't slept together since before we got married and I need sex. I am a sexual woman"

What the heck am I supposed to do with that? That is not what you need over your toast and tea. Thing was, all I did was ask how she was and what was wrong, not for a detailed description of .... that!



Next one was a friend of mine's dad. We had gone back to his at about midnight before he wandered up to mine for all sorts of beer/film/computering activities (nothing weird). We went upstairs where his bedroom was opposite his parent's one. His mum, having opened the door (the muppet forgot his key) had wandered back there in her nightdress and was talking to me about something. My mate asks if she can cover up as its not appropriate cos I am there. His dad, lounging in bed, then replies to this "well I'm not wearing anything" and then pulls back the duvet to reveal that yes, he is in fact wearing nothing. I'm not sure if he expected us not to believe him or something, but there was really no call for visual proof.


Oh, and another mate's dad once enlightened us all round the dinner table that when my mate and sister has been out for the weekend at their grandma's him and his wife had been going at it all the time and that the dog had come in and licked his arse crack. The very same dog that is currently licking my hand.



No comments about length please - my mother might decide its time for another revelation *shudders*
(McMosha is clockwatching at, Fri 7 Sep 2007, 10:42, Reply)