Second chance.
You have my sympathy and empathy over 'losing' your dad to his stroke. My maternal grandmother suffered a couple of strokes when I was in my late teens. She spent a couple of years deteriorating in various hospitals and finally the nursing home, but was never really the Gran who had favoured, spoiled and loved me boundlessly through my young childhood. Although it was a natural part of adolescence, I deeply regret the time I missed with her in favour of hanging around with a bunch of kids I don't even remember.

The second chance comes in with my dad. Being a 'separated family' since before I can remember, I only ever knew my dad part-time and always felt that I was only a part-time aspect of his life. Long story short, we had a few fall-outs with some uncomfortable reconciiations between. I broke the last 'silence' to tell him he was going to be a grandfather. Five months after my daughter was born, dad had a pretty bad stroke. Having seen several among family members, it seemed pretty bad. In all honesty, I thought he was f%*#ed. Thankfully he's made a pretty good recovery and has reasonable mobility and motor skills again. Actually, the common psychological effect of relaxed inhibitions seems to have loosened his emotional tourniquet a little, seemingly making him a little more human. Since then we've both made much more effort to have a real relationship. I even took him fishing - he's shit but enjoys it.

Again, I'm deeply sorry that your dad has been 'lost' to his stroke and hope there is some odd kind of karmic balance that my dad appears to have been 'found' through his.

Warm regards and kind wishes.
Greencloud.
(Greencloud Wanted to go fishing on, Fri 9 May 2008, 13:59, Reply)