Twat Cat
This is a friends story. Said Cat is a twat because its a fish thieving scoundrel and moreover I was going to fit this answer in to whatever this weeks question was regardless of relevance.

Twat cat enters my friends Garden and promptly proceeds on over to the pond to do some fishing. A number of fish have gone missing out of the pond lately so there's now a fence around it to stop any herons, who were getting the blame. The fence has 3 horizontal wires but with the bottom wire removed to allow smaller birds to get to the pond for a drink. Unaware cat is unaware however, because this is an electric fence. Cat crawls through the wet grass and safely under the fence. The greedy little fiend pokes his paw in the water, scouting for the ponds chubby residents. Getting all excited like he is however now unaware of what he's doing with his tail, which brushes the wire behind him. Mayhem ensues as cat shoots 5ft in the air, does 2 backflips and lands on all four paws. In the middle of the pond. Poor thing swims out and sprints out the garden, presumably to go dive on its owners bed covered in pond slime and old leaves.

Maybe I'm the twat for spending all day laughing
(i dont get it tell them a badger got me, Fri 13 Apr 2012, 15:41, 2 replies)

Lovely! Raised a smile and a click!
(friedel, Sat 14 Apr 2012, 10:41, closed)

I like cats
and have had two so far (1 is still alive) but yes they can be utter bastards. The first cat I had was the exception I'd say he probably didn't do anything wrong the whole 16 years we had him but the young one is a complete fucking idiot. So I can safely say I would've laughed even if it was my own cat!
(Captain Sensible "I'll be your animal in a yellow plastic bin", Sun 15 Apr 2012, 14:15, closed)