One Todger, Two broken ankles
Had got back to my one bedroom ground floor flat late one night, we had been clubbing but I was the designated driver so hadnt been drinking. Was just drifting off about 2 am when I heard a knock. Semi-asleep went to the front door and there was no one there. I thought "bloody kids" and went back to bed but heard the knocking again. This time more awake I could tell it was coming from my kitchen. I turned on the light to see a hand on my window, which I opened, to find my upstairs neighbour sitting outside stark b*ll*cked naked.
He asked me to help as he thought he had broken his ankles and was cold. once I realised I wasnt dreaming I gave him an old dressing gown and a drink and awaited for the ambulance to arrive. Kept him talking and warm for about 10 minutes before he was taken off to hospital.
The bloke made a full recovery but what amazes everyone is how he had broken his ankles.

The chap lived above me in a two storey flat scheme. Apparently he had been a sleep in the buff but for some reason had been sleepwalking, out of his flat and woke up when the flat door had closed behind him leaving him with no protection and no money.

I am sure we can all think of what we might do in this situation but he had an ingenious idea. The block of flats was next door to a local convenience store, and one of his flat windows was slightly open. So he climbed on the roof of the shop and took a running jump across the alleyway and at his window. Which lead to him just about grabbing the windowsill for a couple of seconds before falling down like a shaved Wile E Coyote towards his doom. I am not sure what will have hurt more the fall or scrapping your testicles down a rough brick wall.

He moved out as soon as his lease expired.
(lordofallhesurveys How appropriate you fight like a cow, Wed 3 Jun 2009, 12:47, 2 replies)

hmm
I reckon he moved to a ground-floor flat
( ferret -> twitter.com/syfyautocorrect <-, Wed 3 Jun 2009, 12:55, closed)

Well
better than one ankle, two broken todgers!
(TDub Nunc id vides, nunc ne vides on, Wed 3 Jun 2009, 22:28, closed)