Filthy, Rich and Catflap?
A few years ago I was listening to a fairly popular US radio show (for I am a Brit abroad), "Love Line", with Adam Carrola (sp?) and Dr. Drew Pinsky. One of the callers was a young woman, a rep for a medical company, describing her day's work ferrying newly-FDA-approved arsehole transplants around, and watching the replacement surgery being performed.

I have rarely laughed so hard, or indeed been quite so horrified. Replacing a chocolate starfish with a synthetic alternative. What is the world coming to? And what manner of vigorous assault, and for how long, could bugger up (see what I did there?) a rectum to the extent that it needed replacement?

I could never quite get out of my mind the image of a shower cap with adjustable drawstring, and the recipient dialing in the "strength and resistance" when preparing for a night of unholy bum love.

And the cost. $7k (approx 2005 prices - I don't know if spare bumhole inflation has been rampaging over the last half-decade. I do know that I haven't ravaged one in that time...)
(IHaveComeAmongThee__Twice Tissues on the left. Self-esteem on the right., Wed 30 Jun 2010, 15:47, 2 replies)

There we go...
Call it insurance! If it's the catflap issue she is worried about, promise her a new arsehole. Fairly cheap i think bearing in mind the other alternative.
(bROKEN aRROW PUA HVI Master, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 16:34, closed)

New arsehole?
Naaah, gonna be way too expensive. Just get the old one fitted with a drawstring.
(Rsoles, Wed 30 Jun 2010, 21:53, closed)

sometimes needed by
colorectal cancer victims,if i'm not mistaken
(grundig Down goes Frazier! Down goes Frazier!, Thu 1 Jul 2010, 0:48, closed)