3 spring to mind.
the first was wheni was about 13.
my 17 year old brother had managed to wangle having a new years eve party. by about 11 pm i had had enough of his gobby fuckwit mates from cadets and the TA. so being a rescourceful chappie i swiped a litre of JD and absconded to my bedroom. GREAT IDEA!!

theni necked it all in about 20 mins.
NOT SUCH A GREAT IDEA!!

the next thing i know. i wake up at 8 am ina room full of dried puke. it was every where. and about 3 inches thick at that. i cleaned it up as best i could with out my brother twigging what had happened, (since he would be pissed i nicked his JD)altho to do this i had to scrape heavy furniture over my carpet to get teh worst of the crust off.

the next one fast forward to me at about 15 or so. i was drinking in a pub called the favourite near hornsey. and had been hitting it pretty hard while laughing my arse off at my friends complete inability to pull this fine looking irish lass with a incredibly low cut top.. by about 1030 i was starting to feel a bit the worse for wear and decided to look for my buddy to tell him i was off home for the night.i finally find him outside with this irish bird trying to stick his tongue down her throat. so i stumble up to him and tap him on the shoulder...

"hey mark" (for twas his name) "i think im gonna head home for the night maURRRGFGGHHHHHBLURRRGHG!"

unfortunatly for the irish lass as i had tapped him on the shoulder, mark had sidestepped and turned round to see what i wanted. leaving the irish birds spectacular decollettage to bear the force of my efforts, full on, the low cut top acted like a funnel.

the last one was only about 18 months ago (at 25 i really should have known better by then... *tuts*) having helped host a party for 200 people in camberwell i was helping the derig and decided that since i was sleepy another pill was well in order. bosh. down it goes. unfortunatly i had over estimated how long the de rig would take to finish and then i found my self in teh nasty position of coming up on this pill in the backl of a cab doing about 80 miles an hour over speed ramps. after literally choking down this throat load of vom about 3 times i decided enough was enough and hurriedly tried to open the window.

as i turned my head to do look for the handle WHOOOOSH!! out it came. all over the back seat head rest door arch window and ceiling of this cab. my mate was incredibly lucky that the headrest on the chair in front was solid or it would have really messsed with his hair !

i apologise for neither length nor breadth.
( Azra3l Lubrication Persuasion and Brute Force ™, Thu 19 Aug 2004, 21:54, Reply)