Bunch of Mentalists!!
Aah, the benefits of a Grammar School education!

1) The Latin Teacher 'PopEye', on the first day of secondary school, in the first Latin lesson, screamed at a girl for talking while he was. She wet herself, literally.....before we had even sat down. Then he totally ignored the fact she was sopping wet and snivelling, and conducted the lesson with all 30 of us fearing for our lives.

2) The Geography teacher who would sit on her desk in front of us providing us with constant 'Basic Instinct' leg crossing-uncrossing action, even down to not having underwear on. Would have been better if her front bottom hadn't looked like she had half a bear hanging out of it.

3) Metalwork / Woodwork teacher. 'Now don't mix the blue powder with the white powder, it will ruin them, and they are expensive.............RIGHT!!!! WHICH ONE OF YOU LITTLE W**KERS MIXED THE F***KING POWDERS???? YOU USELESS, BRAINLESS, C**TS!!!!'
This man also oversaw my Maths 'O' Level. It is his fault I failed. I couldn't concentrate through laughing, having had him scream from the front of the hall 'IF I HEAR ONE MORE F**CKING FART, I WILL FAIL YOU ALL!!!' five minutes into the exam. Well, we didn't all fail, probably half.

4) Ahhh, the PE teacher. Ex Irish National Rugby player. Slightly tapped, phenomenally sadistic, but then, aren't they all? 'You don't wash it like that...give it here....'
Also taught Biology. Asked which is the only part of the human body that has no pain receptors....a small lad volunteered the answer of 'Earlobes'. This was proved incorrect by him walking up to the small lad and gouging his earlobe with his thumbnail until he drew blood.

Apologies for the state of our education system.....
(EvilBugger, Fri 11 Nov 2005, 10:03, Reply)