Work experience
Back in the days when work experience meant something (i.e. before any concept of health and safety) my mate and I were sent to a local ASDA distribution warehouse to "get some experience of the world". Quite how this was intending to assist two (very) public school boys I have no idea but, after the obligatory kickings were meted out by the assorted pre chav chavs we settled down to corrupting their innocent ways as we were completely unconcerned as to long term employment so were focussed in a different, and more creative, direction.

Having persuaded most of the more senior (you could tell by the lack of clarity of their tattoos) staff to leg it for the afternoon Mark and I proceeded to teach ourselves to drive the forklifts which, I will be frank, was pretty smegging easy.

Having set up a course around the warehouse that was largely created by the use of "ready for dispatch" boxes of crimbo shit for ASDA, we then hurtled around the inside of this cavern whilst the Neanderthals cheered us on. Being souls of generous nature we passed the helm of the forklifts onto the most vocal of these chaps who, in an effort to show the posh kids how these things should be driven, managed to drive the larger of the trucks out of the warehouse. Through the wall. The smaller one, with its forks fully raised, impaled the cab of a rather nice looking HGV that had just pulled in to the warehouse to be loaded.

Public school teaches one a lot of things. How to present oneself as completely innocent of all goings on is one key lesson.

Result was that the work experience boys (myself and Mark) were paid handsomely for the next week whilst we did all the work of the recently sacked chavs whilst we rejoiced in the vindication of the true social order.

After fifteen years as a criminal lawyer I must say that not a lot has changed! Darwinism in action.
(Mediaslut, Tue 15 May 2007, 6:07, Reply)