Baldness is caused by testosterone.
If you are going bald early, you have lots of testosterone.

Therefore you're just more of a man than most people your age.
( Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Sat 16 May 2009, 15:36, archived)

Oooh, I didn't know that.

( WHARRGARBL, Sat 16 May 2009, 15:45, archived)

However, your baldness is obviously caused by something else,
as you're a pathetic little emo nancy boy.
( Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Sat 16 May 2009, 15:45, archived)

Clearly.

( WHARRGARBL, Sat 16 May 2009, 16:07, archived)