I would sing Chelovechki
by t.A.T.u. but two octaves lower.

Hey, if Sisters of Mercy can do Jolene by dolly parton then why not?

however I would not make it to number 1.
( Rotating Wobbly Hat That's not a banana. THIS is a banana., Fri 29 May 2009, 1:50, archived)

I would make sure it does
by rigging the charts like we used to do in the 80's
( TBL I posted this on, Fri 29 May 2009, 1:56, archived)

so that's what
'rigging boots' are for.

In case you drop all the hype wholesale singles on your toes while running out of Makro and dropping them in the boot of yoru Mercedes....,

p.s. are you Louie Walsh? cos if you are I'd like to congratulate you on the ephemeral story about Westlife being up their own arses about getting a number 1 until LW takes them to the boot of his car and shows them the trunkload of CDs he's bought to endure they get to the top of the charts......
( Rotating Wobbly Hat That's not a banana. THIS is a banana., Fri 29 May 2009, 2:00, archived)