You look like you like a bit of Bernard Manning whilst eating some Bernard Matthews.

( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Mon 1 Jun 2009, 10:49, archived)

Whilst arm wrestling yourself.

( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Mon 1 Jun 2009, 10:49, archived)

That's pencilled in for wednesday.

(PsychoChomp, Mon 1 Jun 2009, 10:52, archived)

Last time someone told me to 'pencil it in' I ended up walking all wonky for a week.

( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Mon 1 Jun 2009, 10:53, archived)

and your piss went everywhere

( Malaka omdz, Mon 1 Jun 2009, 10:54, archived)

It does anyway, my rule is : Only piss if you've got an errection
people are always impressed with me doing cartwheels at the urinals, giving a shower party.
( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Mon 1 Jun 2009, 10:57, archived)

Is that a golden rule?

( Malaka omdz, Mon 1 Jun 2009, 11:02, archived)

My rule of thumb is something completely different...

( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Mon 1 Jun 2009, 11:03, archived)