STOP MAKING ME PARANOID!

( Bats, Fri 10 Jul 2009, 9:57, archived)

Considering the circulation of gold over the past 5000 years
it's almost guaranteed that every single gram used in the jewellery business to date has been the cause of a murder through theft, jealousy or inheritance squabbling.
( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Fri 10 Jul 2009, 10:00, archived)

or NAZI JEWKILLING GOLD.

( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Fri 10 Jul 2009, 10:03, archived)

Imagine knowing that the token of your everlasting commitment
used to be the lower 6th molar of Mr. Hendelburg, born in Bydgoszcz, died in Treblinka.
( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Fri 10 Jul 2009, 10:05, archived)

I'm warming to this marriage idea

( wotofco pissing in your swimming pool, Fri 10 Jul 2009, 10:08, archived)

Oh I dunno
that gives me a bit of a lazy lob.

Sadly unlikely for me or any future partner, I only ever buy or wear platinum or titanium.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Fri 10 Jul 2009, 10:09, archived)

Imagine knowing that your cufflinks were made from the platters of hard drives
seized during a raid on a child pornography ring
( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Fri 10 Jul 2009, 10:14, archived)

Don't stop, I'm nearly there...

( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Fri 10 Jul 2009, 10:16, archived)

Or that the earrings you gave her
were made from the melted down reclaimed exhaust catalyst of the car her parents died in. THAT'S love.
( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Fri 10 Jul 2009, 10:20, archived)

You could have the ring made from
specially hardened and lacquered cat shit. That way you will rest easy knowing that the materials used to make your token of marriage were never used for anything other than a jolly good dump.
( Captn Hood-Butter is not dead yet., Fri 10 Jul 2009, 10:14, archived)