Right lets check the list.
I fail on all counts.

*dies*
(Experiment 626, Tue 12 Jul 2005, 11:19, archived)

*knows the feeling*

(Nothing to see, Tue 12 Jul 2005, 11:21, archived)

*rises from dead*
*starts club for the damned*

*dies*
(Experiment 626, Tue 12 Jul 2005, 11:22, archived)