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The JMG machine delivers a "NO, DICKHEAD!" verdict.

(I helped save b3ta! Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Wed 30 Sep 2009, 15:08, archived)
JMG: Could solve all the problems Jeremy Kyle gets approached with in a single sentence.

(I helped save b3ta! Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Wed 30 Sep 2009, 15:09, archived)