You're gonna need a big poop bag

( Boris Johnson's Press Secretary, Fri 5 Feb 2021, 0:19, archived)

fuck that someone else can pick it up if it bothers them
i'm for saving the environment not other people's eyeballs
(Literally Hitler stop playing with my jewlirium, Fri 5 Feb 2021, 0:21, archived)

Do you ever go to bed early?

( Boris Johnson's Press Secretary, Fri 5 Feb 2021, 0:22, archived)

i have to be at work at 05.30
i should be in bed really but i'm busy doing absolutely fuck all and apparently that's important to me at the moment for some reason.
(Literally Hitler stop playing with my jewlirium, Fri 5 Feb 2021, 0:24, archived)