b3ta.com user Bad Horsey
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New website!

Recent front page messages:

So sorry

(Sat 28th Dec 2013, 15:42, More)

So it turns out that the game of the Chilean mine rescue isn't all that great...

Edit: If you want to PLAY this, here's the .TAP file to load into your favourite emulator.

Yes, I really did re-edit the game and sprite data to do this.


Edit 2: Oh yeah, you'll need the code - it's 1113.
(Sat 16th Oct 2010, 1:40, More)

I'll just put this here, then.

(Wed 21st Jul 2010, 21:30, More)

I'll just put this here... oh.
Why have we blocked this image? Because we ruddy well can. We own you and you WILL dance to our tune, motherfucker.
(Fri 9th Apr 2010, 19:03, More)

It's not really that much of a breakthrough, you know....

(Thu 28th Jan 2010, 0:10, More)

Newsflash - Brown solves The Credit Crunch in a single morning

(Wed 26th Nov 2008, 11:28, More)

Heartless bastards

(Wed 23rd Jan 2008, 12:28, More)

What Harry did next

(Tue 24th Jul 2007, 17:22, More)

I'd eat it.

(Mon 21st May 2007, 17:49, More)

"Ooh, Mavis! I think I see what it is!"
Okay. So it's a pearoast and it's pushing the definition of the compo somewhat. But I care not. It's sunny today, I'm going to a party tonight and have a date with that Polish bird from the pub at the weekend. And I hear she goes like a gum machine. Beat THAT.
(Thu 15th Mar 2007, 9:48, More)

Ironically, it STILL doesn't run to Croydon

(Thu 18th Jan 2007, 12:36, More)

News just in

And if you need an explanation
(Mon 11th Dec 2006, 12:39, More)

Ho hum

(Thu 10th Aug 2006, 13:36, More)

Jesus Cocking Christ

I've just been on the phone to the Lexmark support team in Bangalore and it wasn't too far removed from this.
(Wed 25th Jan 2006, 9:28, More)

Ah, that's why he's still hanging in there...

(Fri 25th Nov 2005, 12:45, More)

"An unusual sight for this time of year...."

(Wed 23rd Nov 2005, 22:16, More)

I am so sorry

(Tue 13th Sep 2005, 13:36, More)

Not strictly a pet, but...

(Tue 6th Sep 2005, 11:38, More)

Special templates on the Taleban Nokia

(Tue 6th Jul 2004, 15:50, More)

Last one from me for a week or so

Ooh, FP! What a nice way to end the day!
(Mon 28th Jun 2004, 17:40, More)

This is better as an animation

Edit: Comic Sans on the front page! I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
(Fri 14th May 2004, 10:09, More)

It was his first day on his first job, and he couldn't understand why they were all laughing

Edit: Cheers for the FP!
(Thu 11th Mar 2004, 13:30, More)

For the compo

(Fri 23rd Jan 2004, 16:40, More)

"Mad, they called us, mad!!! But we'll show the bastards..."

(Mon 24th Nov 2003, 19:44, More)


(Mon 24th Nov 2003, 19:11, More)

That's no sculpture

(Tue 11th Nov 2003, 23:51, More)

This has been in my head for ages

(Mon 28th Jul 2003, 20:40, More)

When bacon goes bad

(Thu 19th Jun 2003, 16:21, More)

Somebody would be asking for a refund later

(Tue 17th Jun 2003, 13:44, More)

Not every member of Columbia's crew will be missed

(Tue 4th Feb 2003, 18:45, More)

My first effort...

(Thu 21st Feb 2002, 8:10, More)

Best answers to questions:

» Your Revenge Stories

Simple but effective
Utter bitch of a flatmate / landlady was on the slim-fast diet. I swapped her slim-fast for Build-Up.

She never twigged.
(Fri 14th May 2004, 11:50, More)

» Local Nutters

I recall getting on a tube carriage
That was completely empty apart from one other occupant, an old rastafarian man who was conducting a conversation with his reflection on the other side of the carriage.

I say "conversation"; one half was venomous Jamaican patois, the other consisted of one word - "warlord". Thus:

"Who yuh look at? I cut yuh rass, bloodclaaat!"


"You tink yuh hard, yuh fuckin' bumbleclaart?"


I got off at the next stop. Double quick.
(Thu 16th Sep 2004, 12:15, More)

» Food sabotage

Simple but effective
How do you exact subtle vengeance on your fat lummox of a flatmate who keeps stealing your booze and staple foods?

Why, you substitute her Slim Fast shakes with Build-Up.
(Thu 18th Sep 2008, 16:38, More)

» Mad Stuff You've Done To Get Someone To Sleep With You

I went to Luton.
Beat that.
(Fri 13th Apr 2007, 12:18, More)

» Best Comebacks

After telling an appallingly tasteless joke
My mate said, "Ah, you're a cunt, you are".

To which I replied with a shrug,

"You are what you eat".
(Fri 30th Apr 2004, 8:12, More)
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