b3ta.com user La Chockita
You are not logged in. Login or Signup
Profile for La Chockita:
Profile Info:

Jill of all trades....slings drinks and bad jokes in various bars in NYC. Random adventurer, maker of pies and taster of fancy cheeses. Hobbies include subway adventures to Coney Island, tattoo collecting and learning useless skills ( fencing, Esperanto...etc) on a monthly basis, sending paper letters and collecting Chinese Paper Balloons with animal features.

Recent front page messages:


Best answers to questions:

» My Christmas Nightmare

Top/Bottom 3
1986-Drunk uncle accidently shoots hole in roof during family argument at Grandmother's House, cue police and helicopters.....oh the shame....

2000-On the rocks with live-in bf, decide to drink a bottle of wine before we attend dinner at my mother's house.......so drunk I stand on balconey conversing and when mom turns head vomit over railing discreetly....pass out in dinner plate

2003-Get appendix out, horrible pain, bed-ridden, ex-bf out of town..depressed, thank god for codine and wine
(Fri 24th Dec 2004, 1:40, More)

» My Wanking Disasters

Things you don't need to know and so on,
When I first moved in with my boyfriend, my mother came to visit. When she sat on my bed, my vibrator, which had been stashed under the pillow turned on. When she moved the pillow and saw what it was, she ecxlaimed " Your father and i have been using one togther for years". Severe psych. damage done, I wasn't able to enjoy a vibe for 6 months after that.
(Fri 4th Jun 2004, 4:54, More)

» Your Revenge Stories

That bastard
when i was younger, i discovered my live-in bf was cheating on me with this skanky broad, she was staying over on the weekends when i had to work out of town and she left a bottle of vag. deoderant. When i discovered the bitter, ugly truth i moved out, but before i left i put a liberal amount of chile oil in her cnut perfume, i heard she and the asshloe ex had to go to the ER....... as they had a nasty burning sensation.........hahaha
(Sun 16th May 2004, 10:50, More)

» Embarrassing Injuries

Once when I was seven..........
we were learning how to count using pinto beans in class, for soem reason I stuck one in each each and for some reason I only took one out. I forgot all about the bean in my ear. Fast forward two-three days and baths later, I get an earache and after telling my mom she rushes me to the ER. As it turns out, the combo of the warmth of my ear and regular watering made the bean start to swell in preperation for sprouting. They got the bean out with a scapel of some sort while i lay there restrained by 3-4 nurses. It hurt.
(Sun 5th Sep 2004, 22:52, More)

» Shit Stories

Bright Colorful Poo
During a particularly nasty heat wave, my roomie and I stocked up on popsicles from the local discount store. After eating an entire box my roomate was happy to share the evidence of his purple poo. He spent the rest of the month figuring out how to do different colors and would often leave the end results for me or my bf to find. Nothing like waking up to toilet full of teal shit.
(Thu 6th May 2004, 1:58, More)
[read all their answers]