From my previous stories, you'll know I've met Britt Ekland - her of the famous Wicker Man film, in which you don't see her bottom.
My first experience with her was when we were working on a charity stall (she's a patron of the Alzheimer's Society), and we were trying to flog little fluffy elephants (the AS emblem at the time).

It was just before Hallowe'en, and we'd dressed up for the day for a bit of fun. She'd decided to dress as a sort of Christopher Lee-alike Dracula, but her vampire teeth were a bit old and worse for wear.

I'd helped her fix them in, but one fell out, so I replaced it from another set I had. Typically enough the other then fell out, so I replaced that one too.

And that was my Seller Britt E en-count ersatz three.

Or something.

Fuck off.
( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 8:49, 6 replies)

this makes me regret learning to read
:P
(sittingduck Attention seeking, bullshitting fuck-knuckle, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 9:26, closed)

i hatez teading

( d.r._and_quinch when will you be famous?, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 9:46, closed)

fucking phone
*blush*

*edits* funny typo though eh?
(sittingduck Attention seeking, bullshitting fuck-knuckle, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 9:53, closed)

They are all pretty good this week, which makes up for the lack of worthy answers.

( d.r._and_quinch when will you be famous?, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 12:44, closed)

I exist, Sir, only to serve.
And shag YM, obviously.
( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 9:58, closed)

jesus fucking christ
put the internet out of its misery now, someone
( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 12:58, closed)